Sunday, November 01, 2009
Because all I ever do on my blogs is RIP on my bestfriend (refer to last and the one before that one) Like shes a really good person, but I feel as if Im making her seem like SUCH a bad person? Shes NOT a bad person at all.
Shes the only one whos been there for me the last two years. Because my family's so effed up so I always have a lot of problems come bite me in the face (or another obvious place I wont say)
I'm about to tell you my whole life story so I guess you can kind of figure out how I gained so much weight?
WELL!
My whole childhood consisted of my sister being my mother, and my mom and dad were big into drugs then. Like they were both drug addicts and alcholics :/ and of course I was too little to understand or know what was going on, so I was clueless why they fought constantly and slept 24/7. My sister played mom from 9-15 and I was 5-11 at that point. Well my mom and dad split up when I was... around 11/12. That put a LOT of pressure on both me and my sister, and I had to start depending on myself because whether or not she'd admit it, my sister took it REALLY hard. And SHE started getting into smoking, drinking, drugs, ect. I started eating and writing. Writing: good. Eating: BAD. I gained SOOO much weight in between then and now. And I've moved about 6 times in 2 years. Well 2 years ago when I was 13 (its a couple of months from my birthday right now so Im saying I was 13) my mom decided to get clean. (yes shes been clean for 2 years now [: ) And my dad moved into his girlfriends. I live in an apartment/house thingy and my dad lives down the street. Since my mom uses SparkPeople I wanted yo get into it, and do something for myself rather than kill.
Well the moral to this? I have a rough life and my family's messed up to a point i STILL can't comprehend; and A-Lexus has been with me all the way since I met her. She's the only one who puts a real smile on my face, and doesn't judge me. Although I make her sound like someone who loves to hurt me, and she does sometimes, but she does it to help me; and it makes me stronger. I love her a whole lot and she is NOT a bad person.
Oh, btw... HAPPY HALLOWEEN! its my Daddy's 40th birthday! WOOT! I didnt go trick or treating this year, mostly because I was sick but part of it was so I didnt get candy and tempt myself to death (lol). But I went to my gramas with my best guy friend and saw 2 out of 4 of my baby cousins x3
Love you all and hope I didnt bore you with my story. Thanks for reading today(:
(Im editing this because i felt the need to type something else)
But I want to start "vlogging" but the only way I have a web cam is through my lap top. and whenever i talk it like skips over my words? and it doesnt catch anything I say. I dont know what Im doing wrong so anyone with a web cam and vlogs, or even if you dont! have any ideas? im open to suggestions cause i cant figure out whats wrong... thank you if you answer this!